-= Feigning Innocence =-

[A], stop all the false pretenses. You're just lame and what a joke to take it personally. I should think you were the one who made up all the stories. Sorry, I just can't look at you again without thinking you're such a big hole (pain) in the a**...you get my drift..

Anyways, was kindda piss off today at work. After i finish work actually. I had MC for the last two days during Xmas. Mind you polyclinics doesn't open on PH. So I had to bear with the steep prices of private clinics which amounted to $75. Y the hell would I waste such $ on MC!? It just so happens it falls on Xmas day n Boxing Day. So what? I still paid for MC myself. The company doesn't cover (under probation) and I don't get paid either (unpaid leave). So I'm at the loosing end. You can monitor me or laugh at the passing remark for all I care, coz I'm the one that doesn't gain anything out of it. There! I said it..yes, I'm still not satisfied. But nevermind, they can monitor me all they want...

~~~**~~~

Gosh, in less that two weeks, I will be in THAILAND! Yahoo~ my first ever flight (Jetstar). My dear BF was kind enough to let me sit by the window *shudders* I have a phobic for airplane take off and landing - the pressure thingy. Scared that my eardrums will burst. SERIOUSLY! Don't laugh ok. Everyone has their fears. I'm so fuxcited (f**king excited)!! Hotel bookings done, plane booking confirmed, tours over at Krabi still pending but on the process. Wee~!!

The day before my departure, I might be working afternoon, and guess what? Flight is at 8am and we need to be there by 6 plus. GAH! I won't sleep :) I'm already stressing on how many clothes to bring, which travel bag i wanna use (whether I shud buy) and MONEY!! Need to bring the correct (and extra) cash coz our arrival and departure will be from Phuket as the flight is cheaper. So on our last day, flight will be at night wich is 10pm I think, and we would have ample time to go window shopping or maybe just shopping (!! hehehe) around Phuket town. Wee~! Killing two birds with 1 stone by covering Phuket and Koh Lanta to be specific :)

Aite people, need to sort my finances *winx* :D

**=-_ Of Attitudes & Attributes _-=**

Its gonna be coming near to 2 months being here at my workplace. I enjoy the work, the environment, the benefits, the people...urm...the people? really? hmmm... ;)

See, I may be quiet to alot of 'em but actually I'm at my stage of observing and understanding my colleagues. You can also say that I'm listing out people I should be wary of, stay away from, get close with, potential good friends, so on and so forth.

I already have my labels. *grins* But not all I have fully digress. I'm still at an early stage to be really into hating or liking people.

I have a DM who has the attitudes and attributes of the worst people to work with (like [A]). Maybe my DM can give and take la. Just maybe only ok... I also have a senior who act, walk, talk, behave, everything la (almost!) like a good friend of mine. So, that one can click! *lol* Not giving names to protect the identity of each individual :)

Alhamdullilah, so far so good. I'm learning as I go and I do sometimes make careless mistakes, overlook some stuffs, etc2 but hey, I'm still learning right.

This week is my morning shift and I tell ya, I HATE morning shift!! but I LOVE going home early! *lol* I'm so used to the afternoon shift the past 3 weeks, I couldn't even sleep a wink on the day before my morning shift. *sigh* Took cab to avoid the train. Today I was PUNCTUAL, and guess what?! i took the TRAIN!! *lol* so proud of myself. Took a nap before I start work.

Lets recap, last monday my workplace had a ARDE (Assosiation of Rooms Division Executives Singapore) Dinner and Dance. It was very enjoyable and filling! It was held at Marina Mandarin. One of my colleague got nominated for the Receptionist of the Year. Cool right!? The winner will represent SG in Real Madrid, Spain in 2010! WOW! I wanna be in that nomination (or even the winner) next year! :) Oh yah, we had a dressing room for the peeps who will be going there but all of them went home, so I had the hotel room all to myself! Syiok siah! ;D

To My Dearest Dee,

Sorry for today, I was really pissed. Was so looking forward to collect it today only to find out that I came for nothing. Tommorow we go again ok. I'm sorry I "accidentally" hurt u physically *hehe* You know it was harmless ;p *sigh* i seriously can't face u directly wen im angry. it ALWAYS makes me wanna smile or laugh or just wanna lighten up! tats y i always look away wen im angry. i love u darling *muax* you light up my life :)

::-:: TrouBle ::-::

Dear fren,

why do you find trouble when it doesn't even bother you/your life in the first place. U're really asking for it. And I know and have that strongest gut feeling that it's no one else but you. Why go knock knocking on TROUBLE'S door? Why Why Why??? Do you find great pleasure in disturbing someone else's lives? Are you already bored of your own life that you need to give excitement to the other? I really sympathise with you. Well, it's your grave you're digging, not mine.

~~~***~~~

Enough about other people's lives, lets talk about mine :)

Today was really fun and all even tho all of us met late and started late!

We went karaoke-ing at Grandlink. Cheap! I know I'm such a "katak bawah tempurong". I just knew that this place is cheap. Have always been to KBox. Actually once only, LOL!! But it was DAMN ex and really burning a hole in ur purse! Aite, ex VDG peeps, lets go there again. NO NO. Lets FREQUENT there. *hehe* I miss singing and performing doing shows at ITE and roadshows :(

I miss our Mr Baron, Mr Ernest..that studio we always go to every Saturday..the very location that my met my better half :)

All's changed now. Some joined the real world of the music industry to realize their dream of being an artist.

Talk about realizing your dream - Dear said he's gonna materialise his childhood dream of being I pilot :( .... don't get the sad face wrong. I totally am behind him all the way. He wants to retake his O's, take his A's and Deg. I don't know how I'll be able to cope with his being away and frequent flying and all the endless posibilities (and dugaan). I'll be ESTATIC to know that he can achieve his dreams. I can't realize mine coz unfortunately I've grown in size over the years. Really hard to go back to my small size. *hehe* (i wanted to be a stewardess). But I'm not going for it even if I were given the chance. I just wanna go Dubai (or maybe work there) that's all. Not hard to ask for right :) If Dear was flying there, in the future, i'll just pack and tag along ;)

p.s: the more we talk abt [A] the more I just seem to hate [A]. [A]'s such a hypocrite. Now I know. and now I know why in the first place I wasn't even drawn to [A]. *in soft tone - crescendoes* what the...F**K! :)

*=- NeW MoOn -=*

It was a hectic day to begin with becoz as usual I was late ;(

He had finished a short meeting with his boss early..can't blame me what!! So I quickly got dressed, paint my nails, went to pass motion (hehe) then I hailed a cab. I wasn't about to be late for him coz I didn't wanna keep him waiting longer if i took the public transport. And that's where the agitation occurs...

I already had to wait for a cab about 15mins, and when I finally got a cab, they don't take nets. Coz I hv yet to withdraw cash. No nearby ATM (knn). So I hailed one after the other, about 5 more cabs, all didn't take nets. WTF!!?? and some said they were changing shift la, want to go somewhere else la. watever sia. and the 2nd last one, said he took nets and he goes to my destination and when i was just about to open the door then he said "he no no no. i'm not going there" FUCK U LAH! and i already gave up. i started to walk to the bus stop when i saw another empty cab. ok last one, if not i really damn them all! and thankfully! - he accept nets and he goes to my destination.

I sat inside and immediately he asked, "u chinese or malai (malay)?" i replied i'm malay la duh and he said (like all the others) that I look like chinese, very pretty chinese. exact words "u very pretty chinese siaa" *hahaha* i was like, are u hitting on me or sumting or just being nice? I followed to explain to him that I have javanese blood which explains the chinese look. he was such in awe literally. we sat in silence all the way. so when i was about to reach my destination i looked at the meter on how much i was about to pay coz he was driving quite fast. and guess what!? the meter was not running. lol! his starstruck with my so called beauty made him forget to start the meter. *hahahahah* funny sia this apek. i asked how much it normally cost for the destination. he said ard $8 or $9. then i say, "nvmd uncle, u just charge me $10" so he proceeded to press some button to put the meter to $7 and started the other extra charge meter to the starting price $2.80. The uncle was nice la, so watever the price i pay, reasonably, im fine with it.

I quickly got out and called Dear. In the cab I was already cursing him and thru sms also for something he said. i told him to "fuck off". i cooled down after that and tot to myself, im not gonna let this ruin our day, i'm gonna apologise the moment i see him, which i did - for the first time! lol! not so bad la huh. i used to always be hard nut to crack. i didn't let it happen today :)

We watched New Moon, with Dila coming in the 11th hour. Dear and I changed our seats so that Dila could sit with us. Luckily the movie counter let us. *haha*

Movie review: It was all about Jacob and Bella. Quite boring, but there's alot of random funny scenes. I love love love Taylor Lautner's hot bod! And Rob Pattinson should really stop the cringing face everytime he talks to Bella's character. It's getting old and annoying. And please stop the annoying qn of, "will you do it, at least for me?" Next! ;)

~~~**~~~

..: Holiday :..

~ singing to Madonna's Holiday!
*hehe*

Yeah...! I'm sooo looking forward to a well deserved holiday and also being out of SG for the first time in 10 yrs plus I guess?! Yes.. THAT long. *sigh* I know, I shud get out more often like the plant (referring to SMRT's ad *haha*) :) Planning a 4D3N to Bangkok this coming 7th - 10th Jan 2010. As its the December Hols, besides the obvious, hotels are all fully booked. Which I don't mind anyways coz I can collect all my O.I.L (:

Anywhooo. Work has been so far so good. Alhamdullilah. Note to self: I WILL NOT TOUCH ANOTHER BOTTLE OF LIQUOR EVER AGAIN! 1 week of evening cocktail is enuff for me to hate all those who drink alchohol (malays included). The next two weeks I'll be doing Operator. Just picking up calls and answering queries. Wat else is new. Been there, done that! BUT BUT the most intolerable thing is the AM shift. *sigh* I'm a Facebook addict. I can play my Pet Society for hours! *LOL* yes, its time to cut down, really cut down and go to bed early. Havent had that enuff sleep for the past two days. 3 to 4 hrs of sleep only and wth I need 8 hrs!! Tommorow another morning shift sooo, off for bed now.

Oh wait wait, need to eat mum's (my fav) nasi goreng! weee~!

And and... I MISS YOU AND LOVE YOU MUHD SHAHID HARON ~!!! xoxoxo

*-= Caught in a Bad Romance =-*

I'm not really in a bad romance...I love Lady Gaga! Who doesn't?! :)

Anyways, I'm broke. I'm left with my final $30 for work transport. *sigh* Luckily food is provided at work so I won't have to worry much. This misery gotta end once I have fully settled down on my new job.

FYI, I had bed bug bites. Its all over my hands, my back of neck, my foot, my thighs.. *double sigh* It has been 2 weeks already. I had been worried it was gonna be some bad diseases. But Praise Allah, the bites are finally easy off but still very visible. Thankfully i wore jacket at work, if not the hotel guests will be so bewildered.

Updates? Urm, had gone to watch Dee's company held an event named Resonate at Tampines Mall last Saturday. My next off? Thurs -_-" last off was on Tues. *Sigh* Training this week? Evening Cocktail. F*ck alcohol.. Can't wait for this week to end quickly.

Had my orientation today for both Grand Park City Hall and Park Hotel Clarke Quay. It was somwhat dull, duh, the usual stuffs of security, fire drill, our staff benefits etc2. It reminded me of my previous orientation at RWS. With a large group and HELLA FUN! Seriously, i do miss them, I do miss cycling to the construction site, and i do miss having 2 days off a week!! *lol*

Will have a 2nd one which is only half day on Wed and thn I have to report back to work again from 1pm to 9pm. Sien!!! I wanna claim hours...I don't want OT! *hehe*

Body is still adjusting to 6 day work, shift work, morning shift especially and getting to know (observe actually) the workers there and also trying to see my future in this line. Trying very hard. *sigh* I pray God will guide me and help me. But first I need to help myself - i noe la! :)

Aite, nite peeps :)

Today was the first day. Urm, what can I say, still fresh, still a newbie, STILL need to get to know the work well and know the people.

I MISS THE USS PEEPS~! *sigh*

No regrets, just that I miss working with fun people and doing fun stuffs... Wore heels and wear nice uniform and guess what I did? Dishwashing!! *lol* Wasn't told to do so. Was out of "free labor"/volunteered myself. There was suppose to be a steward, but I don't know where the person was. This two weeks I'll be at the Club House preparing breakfast, tea breaks and evening cocktails for the guests. When I heard cocktails, I thought, SHIT!! ALCOHOL!! damnnn.. Tawakal dgn Allah. It's only for two weeks then I'm going front desk. Oh God..help..

Anws, my feet hurts! Arghh! Well, gotta get used to it. Working morning shifts all the way. Yes, Including this Sat and Sun (-_-)" Miscommunication again with HR.

aite, gotta go sleep now. Working at 7AM tmr!! (-_-)

*-= I Was Sent Back Home =-*

*Hehe* Yeah, for not bringing/wearing proper shoes. I was on sandals. There was miscommunication on both sides. Tried to get thru HR the past few days but couldn't, not my fault what. *lol* And also I was "suppose" to be aware that I'll be wearing my uniform on my first day, NOT! I didn't know first day training was already on the job! *haha* Ok my bad...

Anyways, I had another day off, so went shopping on y work shoes with beloved sis, Syawal and had late lunch with them and Dee. Ate at Pizza Hut TM. The WORST ever! Don't need to explain further. Really really bad. Guess the feedback form I give will be read once and straight goes into the rubbish bin. I really don't care. So pissed off...

So I have gotten myself the pair of shoes from Mondo, and hair net thus now I'm soo ready for work tommorow. Wee~!

On Monday, I had watched This Is It, MJ's supposedly concert turned into movie. I had tears in my eyes, watching him meekly and wearily dance to his all time dance moves. There wasn't even a moonwalk, and he forgets his lyrics, he wasn't at all energetic, no feel, and all the things you can spot when someone is really tired and being forced into something. One thing I respected that he was a perfectionist. And he's damn good at it. Such a waste of precious talent and an inspired soul t many. I pray that he really had converted to Islam, coz he deserve to be in a wonderful place.

And I'm soo freaking pissed off with a few people that sat beside us. they wer suppose to sit from no. 1 to no. 6 BUT they came from the other end of the seating and crossed path infront of us. are you damn stupid or what! u can go out to the way u cme in and sit at ur seats from there easier BUT NO! they had to walk infront of us, all 6 of them!! F**K U lah!! one motherf**ker even went to dreamland 15mins into the movie. Blardy hell, dont waste ur time and money dude! i had a terrible ache mid show, had to really P.S! all their bags were on the floor, i tripped and nobody said sorry. dammit! found out, they were china men and a woman..knnbcbb! and then Dear had an encounter too, this couple sat beside him, actually the gal to be specific, her back were against him so she lean and lean backwards and knocking over Dee. annoying, didn't even apologise too. wargh!! after 5 mins they left, WRONG SHOW!! double WARGH!!

ok ok maintain...pppffftt!

Halloween 2 was totally CRAP! Yes, expect another sequel to the already nonsence and predictable movie. Darah was superbly good, but a waste that I really didn't quite focus becoz I was too darned sleepy!

Oh yes, talking about movie...I WON ONE PAIR OF TIX! unfortunately tho, its a movie preview to Paranormal Activity. I've seen the reviews, I've seen the trailers before anyone in SG did (i think) LOL! Yeah, fake movie *duh~* but who cares! I won and I'm bringing Dear along! Gonna watch it this Friday night..hope I won't lose focus again coz the movie is gonna be very draggy.. (-_-)''

aite, off to bed and get ready for new job tommorow.

*-= Tomorrow's a Brand New Day (all over again) =-*

Yes, am gonna strat a new training session for a month starting tomorrow.

I'm sooooo freaking excited!

Last day at RWS was kindda slow and boring. I was on single shift and not many people from my batch were present coz alot of them were on Off In Lieu. But I had the most fun time with them on Friday! Karaoke-ing and all :)

I will dearly miss them alot. They are the most happening bunch of all!

Will tag everyone of them on Fcebook to show my greatest pleasure of knowing them :) they're the best bunch of people I've worked with in my entire working life. *haha*

Ok peeps, gotta sleep now. Have to report 9am tommorow *excited gle!*

:.:.: Let's Talk about Work :.:.:

I hate this word, WORK.

It can be define in so many ways which is up to each individual's perseption on work. Once you're fresh out of school, you've already attained your highest qualification (that you can go), it's time for you to face the real world; the working world.

We see our parents everyday slog it out, day and night just to keep food on the table. When their time is up, for them to retire, it'll be our turn to put food on the table and then care for them like how they care for us when we are small and still schooling.

And when the time comes when we have our own family, we will then have to care for our partners and children too.

WOOUHH..stop right there.

*haha* If I continue further I'll be talking about marriage, which I always do to that someone actually :)

So here's the thing, people always ask. "What do you wanna be?" "What do you wanna do?"

I tell myself, I have alot of things in mind that I wanna be when I grow up. I wanna be an air-stewardess, criminal lawyer, journalists, tour guide, radio DJ. I have alot of ambition growing up. Alot of things relating to meet the people frontline, interaction, travelling. YES, I wish to travel the world, and not in 80 days, but take my time on every country. I wanna take the airplane and cruises :)

I can't become a stewardess, I can't work on a cruise ship, so my alternative? I work in the tourism sector. I wanted to work under STB, any prestigious hotels and one of the IRs. I joined RWS but the work is not what I wanted to do. I can't get a jobat STB, somehow it's so damn difficult to apply for it. So what's left? Hotel that is ;)

Next week will be the start of my training. Probation 3 months. Standard lor. And this time, I'm gonna make my work, my passion. Some people work for money, some people make their money work, but me? I belong to that minority, where people work for passion. Nowadays it's very hard to find people that work for their interests. Alot of people I know go for better paying job which does not involve what they like or maybe what they had studied. Weird? In the first place why study that subject if later in life you won't pursue it? Waste of money?? I don't care. I don't care if at the start I'm paid nuts. I'll work my way up, I'll pursue further studies if I have the money and I'll work hard for it.

I knew some friends who had some friends working in the budget hotels. You know how bugdet hotels work right? They earn alot! Their revenue? Those who go in for few hours of pleasures. From all races and all walks of life. I don't wanna be involved or in malay subahat in this kindda operation.

Well, we'll see for far this passion will go and whether that spark will last my lifetime :) I pray God will always lead to do all things good which is always blessed by Him.

On a random note - mirror mirror on the wall, show the fairest of them all...

*

**

***

****

*****

******

*******

*****

****

***

**

*

This was taken at IKEA Tampines

ps: i need to revamp my room!! :)

::-::- Cream of the Crop and to top it off, with a Cherry on Top -::-::

Well people, as most of ya all noe, it was my 22nd Birthday yesterday (171009).

Seriously speaking, there were no presents, cakes and whatever fancies you have on a normal birthday celebration. All I had were my colleagues the whole day as I was working from 11.30 to 9pm. As today was a public holiday, we hadn't much anyhting to do so the afternoon part was just looking thru some slides on the different themed attractions that we will have at Resorts World Sentosa and the evening part was the best part of all!!

We played mind concentration games, laughed at all the jokes which was NON STOP! I love this bunch of friends, they are the happening ones of all the batches of workers that joined RWS. We also gossiped about some people - DUH!! *haha* They sang birthday song, sabo me by letting me sing. I sang the National Anthem (one liner) by the way! *hhaha* Gerek people, but sadly, I'll be leaving them for a better career advancement in the hotel industry. I'll get thru to all the obstacles and I will prove BF wrong that - "jgn nanti da join hotel, u pula menyesal and nak alik g sentosa eh". I swear I'll prove him WRONG! I have gotten Mum's blessings and I hope God will also lead me through it all. Amin.

And the cherry on top for the day was meeting HIM at the end of my shift. Had looked forward since morning to meet BF. Sadly, its only for 2 hours coz he's afraid he'll miss the last bus if he sent me home. Which I actually don't mind becoz....we're meeting again tommorow together with Hussien and Amsyar and head to Night Safari's Halloween night! WEE~!! Cant wait. I've invited the rest of the peeps but I think everyone busy or short cashed. It's ok. Well, wattodo.

Ok, thats all peeps, I had the most fun time at work for the first time in my life on my birthday. Thanks all for the wishes too. Next birthday celebration for? Mak Busu and Nurul Khairiah :)

*-=- Good Times -=-*

On Saturday 101009 was our VDG peeps raya outing. All of us met late at Hussien's house, at 5pm! No worries, there was transport. All in all, it was quite tiring although only 7 houses. The most tiring would be Shahid coz he was driving manually. Kesian syg ku...

Oh yes, talking about my Dear BF... *sigh* He gave me the shock of my life. Its been some time (a long time actually!) since someone gave me a surprise, a birthday surprise to be exact. *haha* it was all planned! I initially saw that Shahid called Hussien. I was wondering why he didn't call me instead. I pass it off. When it came, I was really taken aback. Muka confem nampak terkejut berok nye! He did it successfully without me finding it out first :) The following pics location is at his house. PS: he had the cake the whole time at the back seat of the car while i was sitting with him at the front!

lighting up candles for the unsuspecting victim! -_-"

and here is the bdae gal, teary-eyed actually!

with the mastermind :) <3

with the people who made my day :X

The day was a wonderful one. We laugh like crazy, make fun of each other, sang in the car, duelling with both cars, visit each other's home, ate at EVERY single house we went and of coz take lots of stupid, nice and "artistic" photos :)

Special thanks to Amsyar, who bought me a box of Ferrero Rocher (finish already!) Humairah and Hassan who got me a sweet bracelet (nice!). Presents are things which I don't want people to get me. Their constant presence are enough for me to treasure.

A special mention for my beloved sister, Siti Aishah who turns 18 today 121009! Happy Birthday & Love ya sis, muax! xoxo

Can I have this as my house? An ice cream top-roof house??

Watched this movie last Tuesday with Shahid and Hussien. Gerek!! 4/5 stars :)

I had attended Corporate Induction at RWS office at Jurong for the past two days. Definitely it was tiring. Not becoz of my lack of sleep. No! It was becoz of the travelling time that it actually took to get there. I didn't mind anyways because I had so much fun doing ice breaking with my new friends/colleagues, we played teamwork games, poked fun on one of the trainers, we had gerek trainers too, laugh like crazy and got a peak on each individual's weaknesses today.

Tomorrow, we'll all be going down to construction site. See all the works, maybe do test runs or learn how to use the buttons and maybe also familiarise with the floor. I dunno. Honestly, I dunno what we'll be doing everyday until the reopening of the park draws nearer. All I'm looking forward to are the TEST RIDES!! YAHOO~! We'll be the first in SG to be riding the cool rides and basically everything lah! Excited to the max :) but I have this one thing bugging me, damn I'm gonna be tired and scared and nervous becoz, we'll have to handle 30k pax once it open doors!! 30 000 ok don't play play!! Well, not all 30k will be riding but u noe, at least 80 or 90% will be queining up! Definitely, I'll take Dear there as soon as it opens :)

Ok, gtg. I have to report work at 8.30am tmr. Luckily from then on it'll be at Sentosa. Phew!

Last but not least, I'm so not looking forward to the peeps raya outing this Saturday. Dun ask me why, so many f**king reasons if I were to list down.

Aite, nite people :)

Me and Shahid watch this two movies in a week *haha




Review for Fame: The songs were great. I love that Marco charater. He's damn cute. *haha* Tho I was expecting to hear some remixes from the originals like Body Electric at their Graduation Day, but I was left dissapointed, together with Ayid. Naturi Naughton didn't even sing the OST Fame. blueh... Overall 2/5 stars.
(currently I'm watching Fame 1980 - I wanna compare which is better)




Review for Phobia 2: Skit 1 - just imagine Hantu Gala. *haha* yup. Typical Hungry Ghost style meets Hantu Gala. Quite scarry yet abit dissapointing coz there was some inconsitency. Skit 2 - a kurang ajar nurse lets the patient die and soul be switched. scarry mary!! Skit 3 - zombie nonsense. u noe the rest. but got bonus, cute lead actor! skit 4: mama's lost her boy. abit tense but then the ending was illogical, as what Ayid said (-.-) Skit 5 - the best! sequel to one of the skits in 1st movie. laughable like crazy!! *haha* storyline also not consistent. yet, i enjoyed the movie!! 4/5 stars becoz of the last skit :)




Yesterday we had quite a big quarrel. Me and my mouth. I just can't shut my trap. Once I start hurting him, i won't stop. I really don't think of the consequences. I'm really thankful, tho he will always defend himself too and say all those harsh words, it's always him whom will give in first and say his i miss yous'. I wasn't ready to give in yet. Yes, hot headed and stubborn.

And the best part was, I sincerely forgot that 3rd Oct(yesterday) was our 3yrs 2 mths anni together. He msg persistently but I didn't reply. We both went online and chatted. Debated actually. I became soo sleepy I just left him at that.

We met in the afternoon after his class. The moment I saw him I felt like saying a thousand apologies. We hugged while waiting for the train. I really melt, melt in his arms. I didn't wanna let go. I just wanna tell him how sorry I was, but I kept mummed. The whole journey we hugged, joked and things became back to normal.

I'm thankful, really. He's like no other. Never will a man be like him, the only one who can put up with my nonsense, so damn patient, and mostly, the one who understands me the most and will stay his ground beside me no matter what.

I love you Dee, this relationship will last I promise. Amin.

Happy Anniversary syg *muax!*

*-= Starting From Scratch =-*

On the day that I signed my letter of employment to Resort World Sentosa, I also rejected the opportunity to work in a hotel :(

I know the desicion was a hard one. I'm starting at Universal Studios from scratch. Literally from scratch seeing that we will be the so called pioneers of the whole amusement park. Its still in construction period. We'll be going down to the site next Friday. Some say I'm lucky. I don't what about it is lucky but its definitely a priviliged.

The briefing day listed everything I wanted to know - which is the career growth. I know I have a Diploma and I should be going for something better than crew. Actually, I haven't got the cert yet (-_-)" But still, its a stepping ground for me to gain this fortunate experience of working in the Tourism industry, and who knows, I might after one year move elsewhere within the park and further my career prospect.

All of this will be decided in the long run. Now all I'm doing is to rest and be fully recharged before I start my new job. Eeerr, now would be only corporate induction first lah coz the park is not up yet what. *haha* Still, I'm excited.

Still Undecided

Which will you guys prefer to work?

Resort World Sentosa (ground floor at the attraction side) or at a prestigious Hotel?

Pay wise a difference of $200. The first will have a shift between 9pm to 6pm. The later has 3 shifts rotating 24hours. *sigh*

Im so stress... One which I already got the other which is still pending 2nd interview. How? :(

...I Got a Feeling

I had my interview today at a certain hotel with regards to the post of a front desk position. And I felt good about it. Really. Was late (yes, again) actually for the interview but the HR person didn't say anything abt it, so I buat bodoh lah. After talking with her, she called up the front desk manager and he assesed me about my job scope, my height (??), my shifts (24hr split shifts), and esp about smiling :). All in all, it went well. I was supposedly to meet the GM (OMG!) but he wasn't available. If I think if I were to mit the GM, I would have known my fate there and then BUT, I had to go for a 2nd interview next week.

Next week will be the start of my other job which I accepted a few hours before the HR of that hotel called for an interview. That explains my previous entry. I got the position at a student/preschool centre but I'm really keen on pursuing my interest or shall I say, my passion for the Tourism industry. My Dip will go to waste if I let this hotel job pass me by just for this childcare industry. But I'm not 100% sure I will get the hotel job, thats why I'm like in between right now. I still go for the job I already accepted but still looking forward or maybe hoping actually to get the hotel job.

All I know is, I wish to pursue my passion given the chance, no matter what it cost me.

I think I reveal too much already, BYE now!

Really Confused...

I don't what to do. I ask people for opinion while all the time I had the answer, or actually the solution to all this headache of mine.

*Sigh*

God please help me in my decision making. I really don't wanna make a big mistake or a career murder in my life.

:(

*-*- Wee -*-*

Two interviews tommorow. You won't believe the change in career I had chose with these two companies. Lol!

One is in childcare industry.

The other in the SAF.

*haha*

will update tommorow if everything goes well.

InsyaAllah, amin.

Its That Time Of the Month Again..

where I feel, I should have made something good out of my life by doing someting right. Which is?

Which is, properly stabalise, save all that money while I had worked full time in my previous job which happen to also be my current job. Lol! Yes, I went back to my old workplace. Silly right? Out of all the companies, I went back to the 1 who couldn't properly care for their employees. Whattodo... I love the environment, the people, and also I'm so used to the job already. Yeah it pays peanuts on part time basis, maybe I'M the one who made the pay look like peanuts. I really didn't commit. Because, I don't feel the need to as I'm only a part timer. And wth, I'm schooling part time too.

Talk about school..BAH! I really am in serious desicion with my head about quitting. The best part, this is my last module. Last module so what?! I have to repeat a few modules. Which of coz I'm sincerely not proud of. I was to commit my full if not 90% of my attention to school assignments and tests. But see what I've been doing..finishing my exams as quickly as I can so that afterwards I could go "pak-toh" as what you all call it. *sigh* I can't regret now can I? I'm already 90% through and halfway already finishing my study loan. Yup, just one more year and I'm over and done with. Well guess what!? With that amount of money, I could already get engage and start to save further for my marriage! *sigh* Too Little Too Late.

I did so many damage. Serious damage on my work history. I won't explain futher, the rest is history.

Currently, in short, I'm playing truant too. I come late to work (I know I'm at fault) but why should I come early?! Just to do recovery?! Argh! It can be done any part of the day what! And mostly, I DO NOT agree with my current manager. I just can't bring myself too. I want my old manager back. *sigh* Promise this time around when he takes over I won't break the rules LOL!!

Well, now I'm fretting over it like dunno what. Coz, its always the email results that brings me down. Its always that email from the school. *sigh* Maybe its just me. I'm just hopeless. Useless. Careless. Brainless.....

I want to believe in miracles, but first...

I have to start with me :/

....Geylang Slipar Ku Geylang

*hehehe* Slipar kepe!? Anyways peeps, I had ample time to walk around breezily trying to find my baju raya for this year. This year, it's team WHITE :D Had already plan before hand with dear BF *lol!*

Kan bagos kalau hari2 Geylang mcm tu?! Hahaha. Cannot lah, the sellers there will curse me. Coz no business mah!

After work today decided to meet him up to break fast outside. Suddenly a lone ranger called asking if we could meet up. Who else, it was Hussien! *haha* He went window shopping and then later met up with us at SG Post KFC.

Walked around Geylang, goofing around and disturbing the mak ciks selling clothes and chapal (malay traditional shoe for the males). I saw alot of baju kurung that really catches my eye. But I'm on a budget. Cannot overspend coz I need to set aside some cash for the lil ones (IF i have some) and also for our upcoming holiday! Wee~! Can't wait :)

That's about now for today...*eyes closing soon*

Nitey ppl~!

Selamat Mempertahankan Nafsu Anda Semua a.k.a

Menjalani Ibadah Puasa (dengan sempurna)

('',)

...Rocky Road (thinking brownie ;p)

Today I was really walking on uneven road. Not literally, but metaphoricly speaking. In short, I was in an emotional rollercoaster yesterday. I wasn't spared the naggings early in the morning before going to work. Was already late, and she made it worst for me. Even worst when I reached work. Containing the tears and the uncontrolable sobbing was very hard. I burst out immediately while on the phone with him at the staircase in the shopping mall.

I talked about running away from home or being better DEAD than alive. I did thought of so many ways to hurt myself physically. I want people to feel what its like having to lose me.

As much as i talk, i never did any of those actions. One, coz I'm a coward. two, becoz i felt that its not worth it. Yes, it was my fault. But sometimes, just ONE time, i wanna make them feel how it feels to lose me. She knows very well that she needs me. And I need her, definitely.

Thanks so much for the lecture cum listening ear Shahid. It did good, honestly.

The moment I reach home, I wanted to know my Business Statistics result. And yay! I got a B, alhamdullilah :) If I had failed, I would have cursed and swear to my classmate who didn't gave me the last exam tips. KNN YOU. but thankfully I passed, if not..he's a dead man!

This coming Saturday will be my supplementary paper for F&B. I studied so hard to pass my exam but it wasn't enough. But i really don't mind retaking again. I'm sure I'll pass, insyaAllah.

Two more exams to go..oh no. 3 actually, coz there's another sup paper I haven't taken which is for Business Law. *sigh* Ok, don't sigh too much Aimi. This is important! Yeah...

Well, that's about it from yesterdays news.

Today? Nothing much except that we explored ION @ Orchard. The Food Hall was really STUPID. I don't see any halal stores. BORING SHIT. All chinese foods. How can?! Indian food also not much variety. Spotted one store selling no pork/lard. But, not 100% sure whether its halal. Why can't our food stalls here be like Malaysia?! *sigh*

Went for my first Economics class today. BORING! Seriously dull. The lecturer was just talking bla bla bla. I paid no attention by logging in to WiFi on my h/p, scribbled on a blank paper, staring at the book....

Oh well, gotta endure, its ending soon :D

...Do You Remember The Time (When We fell In Love)

I do, distinctly. I'm sure he does too.

Well, exactly 3 years ago, he came over my house district. He was from work and was eager to meet me. He didn't bring any food back for me as he normally did. But wth, he's here, why should i care about food right?

Anyways, i still remember what he said.."Do you wanna make US official?"

I was like, "are you serious?"

"Tak nak tak per"

"Eh, sape tak nak!? *blush*

Hakz. Very funny but a lil annoying after that. Won't go into details tho. Personal uu~!

I came to realize today that years before I met him, I prayed to Allah to ask for a guy/future husband of which I wanna spend the rest of my life with.

I asked for him to have:
- qualities of a family Khalifah, one who will lead me to Him
- someone who plays the piano and sing beautifully. okok! i didnt pray for that but i wanted that (a bonus la kire!)
- some1 full of intelligence and common sense and who stands his ground like me.
- he who would remind me of my insecurities/ faults and make me see the light
- some1 who really knows how to make me happy

Those are just to list a few. And well, my Dear bf now has all those qualities. Really. Maybe some or majority of friends don't see it. I see him as a person, and I really commend him for all this. Yes, he may not be perfect in so many ways. God works in mysteries. He gave me what I want but in turn I have to deal with a few glitch. He has to endure a few loose screws in me too. Both of us aren't perfect. Our relationship so far wasn't perfect too, but all these makes us just human. And the things we compliment each other just seem to work out till this day and each day forever more. We always compromise and make up for each day that's lost through our endless fightings and quarelling be it publicly or just between ourselves.

I really appreciate him a whole lot coz he takes care of me, he knows how to push all my buttons (not thinking yellow-mindedly k!), he knows what I want, he knows what I need and he help me in any way n every way possibly that he can. He's like my other half, one who will be that person who brings me up when I'm bringing myself down. And when he does feel down himself, definitely its vice versa. He taught me alot.. ok I'm getting all teary eyed now. sheesh.. ;'-(

Well, my last note is, I won't let this beautiful realtionship be wasted away. Not coz of my short temper/disagreement or watever that is I have with him. I get too carried away sometimes. I love him to bits and pieces no matter how harsh and physical I can be with him.

I love you Dee.

We'll celebrate it this Sunday ok Love? Couldn't make it today coz of financial stuff and coz i'm working today. Let's make up for the lost time, but thanks for dropping by my work place to spend at least a moment with me. Appreciate it Darling...Hugs n kisses! (n i don't care if ya All say I'm being mushy ok!?) :)

Love,
aimi

...And I'll Leave You To Your Death

Not literally but, i'll leave him to become the kanchong spider definitely. I'm referring to my curent manager. He's not giving me enough days to work whilst actually i am able to, so when I leave the shop later on, see if he can cope the shop with one staff down and see if he terkial-kial finding a replacement in short notice. I don't wish to sabotage my other colleagues but this kind of manager MUST NOT GIVE FACE ONE! He dosen't know how to manage his staffs, organize the shop in order, do stocks and etc2 (too many if i have to list it down - he's just damn *6 letter word*).

Anyways, I'm glad that both interviews today had gone pretty well, the way I expected it to turn out, although I was actually worn out by the time I was on my way to the Zoo. (-.-) But i immediately perked up after seeing my Dear Dee =D

Despite messaging all the peeps to meet up to watch the fireworks, nobody except Umairah, Izzat n Aifa who kindly replied to my message saying they can't join us. I'm actually quite pissed off. If Dee were to msg them all to ask out for a gathering, all will reply. If I were to msg, hmm...habok pon takda. So from now on peeps, if you guys don't find me msging you or ask for a small meet up, don't bother to msg me in the future and ASK ME OUT or even reply to any of your msg. Ni bukan pasal majok ke ape eh, coz I'm sick and tired of wasting my messages and waiting for unreasonable people who dun give a flying f**k. (and i hate it if ppl nvr bother to reply my msg with rgrds to impt stuffs..argh!)

Well, push that aside, next Wednesday I'll be going for Zoo's OJA (on the job assessment). Told you my interview went well =) Looking forward is one thing, but I have class later in the evening and i am on full shift the next day. Penat keper!! OMG...

For the Universal Studios, they'll get back in less than a month's time, hopefully. Praying that I will nab it. Part time pon part time lah. I'll work my way from the bottom, up. Even if I don't graduate with a Dip cert this October, I'll go by the alternative way to get a good career prospect w/o it. It's not the end of the world. I may waste my $4k+ but the knowledge is the most important thing., which is priceless. Thanks to my Dear, who will support and help me now, tomorrow and future.

So that's all the updates I have for now. Pictures can be viewed on my Facebook link:

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=94064&id=612849040&l=a2bdfbd462

...Happy Shalalala~

I'm quite happy that Universal Studios called back to rearrange the interview. That day when they called, I was having school on that particular time that they wanna held the interview.

Anyways, I'm NEVER..I repeat..NEVER, am I gonna lose my chance again. I'll be punctual and I'll answer with confidence (not that I havent been doing that). Ok, extra confident but not over confident. (-.-)

Was on my work today in the morning, and least expected SG Zoo to call for interview, SAME DAY as the universal studios interview. Arghh! I'm gonna be like a mad woman man going north and south of SG! It'll all be worth it..hopefully..praying for it.

Thanks to my Dear BF for pushing me to apply for SG Zoo. He looked for me jobs which I'm surprised I don't find them myself. The Universal Studio(US) was my effort (i don't depend on him ok), I looked thru their official webbie. The first time I tried, I failed coz I think was becoz of my honest to honest work history. Guess my integrity wasn't what they wanted. And anws, US will be a part time position. I don't mind starting from the bottom up. When there's opportunity in the future, I'll grab it.

*-= If You Love me, Love The Ones In My Life Too =-*

Wanted to catch Harry Potter 6 but apparently all the tix sell like goreng pisang lor. Eh wait, not goreng pisang but sell like donuts! Just like when Transformers started screening. Yeah...

Met up with Dila, my sis and him. The person who originally invited to watch the movie, had went home; just to recharge his battery flat mobile (-.-)

Wanted to also cut my hair BUT but but...hmmm. Will go tommorow at the barber shop near my house.

Anyways, how I feel like I could tell him why I'm so upset now. But i felt like its hopeless. Sigh..forget I even mention this. I'm soooo pissed off with her. And this ain't the first time. Should I be HATING her? Hate is a very strong word. Can she just leave us alone?! Well, I think for this part, I'm speaking for myself, so - can she blardy leave me alone! Leave my love life alone?!

*-=trying the best that i can to be a gd gf, guess i tink it'll nvr b enuff=-*

...Stuck With Each Other

Hey yo! My legs are super soar. Eversince yesterday. *sigh* I need to visit the massage parlour soon. Anyone wanna join me? *lol*

Today went to meet Dee. Was VERY super surprise on the amount of pay that I get for this month. -alhamdullilah-

What else? SHOPPING! Not that much lah. Here's what I bought...










-= blusher =-










-= compact powder =-













-= hairband =- -= looks like this when u wear it =-













-= the sachets n bottle cream were free when i sign up as a L'Oreal member =-

After the shopping, went home and got ready for school. What a bothersome it was!? I was at the wrong place for class!! WTH! I went to Starhub Building instead of the designated class for the day which was at Wilkie Edge at Princep St (around there). My friend, Des, convinced me to just take a bus and meet her there. I was half hearted at first but relent.

Anw, with full of confidence thinking that Pearl Centre was opposite the building, i took 143. Guess where I ended up? yes, Pearl Centre at CHINATOWN! Sheesh. So i thought, what the heck, might as well go home. Was effing tired already.

So here I am, at home blogging :D

Quite upset that I didn't get the position at Luge. *sigh* Guess some things aren't meant to be. Was looking forward to getting out of current position. *double sigh*

Won't explain further...Bye!

...Blank!*

Grandma tried to matchmake me with a distant relative.

(-.-)

...Somewhere Over The Rainbow, Way Up High

Wokeup at 9 am, stalled and snoozed my alarm clock till it was 9.30 then I just didn't wanna wake up, YET. Was really very tired. I don't know why. Too much hogging in the wee hours of the morning infront of the computer I guess.

The best part was I have an interview at Luge. Won't go into detail. If I geddit, I will tell ya. If I don't...I will still tell ya! *hahaha*

Went to school afterwards. Was dead tired, I felt like just lying on the floor and just sleep! I still endure the Business Accountings (yes, a/cs!!) but left after the half-time break. And heck! I was suppose to ace this subject coz i had spent a F::King 2 years studying accountings in ITE! But, this hard drive of mine has gone rusty or i guess it must have re-booted itself after I graduated. Or maybe I just let my hard drive be re booted coz I really didn't wanna touch that particular subject anymore in my life! I never thought I'll be doing it againg, darn! I could only underdstand/remember so little from whatever that my Lecturer says! Hell, I'm in trouble! *haha* Well, things can be learned right?

Met Dee at Centrepoint and was wondering where to head to. Was thinking about visiting the Arts Museum but the free entry which only starts at 7:30pm and at that time it was like what, 4:30 after we had lunch cum dinner? *hahah* So, i told him my bro was watching the Parade for the NE show, we decided to head there.

The view infront of the Esplanade stage was a great spot for the show that was put up by the Army and Navy. Great show!! The Chinook (wrongly spelled earlier as chinop, ok Dee, shut up, don't laugh! grrr) was great, the showcase of how criminals are chased on water was spectacular, but...don't expect much tho. Not that many things they are doing this year. Buget lah katerkan. Watev! It was getting very dark and heavily cloudy later in the evening and guess what?! It rained so freaking heavily during the fireworks display!!! Yay, I missed it! Dang. Poor dear old bro and the other thousands or so spectators that were there. Drenched and can't go anywhere until everyone is evacuated systematically. *haha*

Aite, here are some snippets... =)

And we saw the great big rainbow..pretty! <3

:: aLhamduLLiLah ::

Allah telah mendengar dan memakbulkan doaku.

Well, the first thing I saw on my email inbox was a subject headed Results Release for Marketing Supplementary Paper. Was EFFING nervous larh! I really thought I'm gonna remodule again for that paper (which cost $450 and re-class is next year).

God answered my prayers, Dia lah Maha Suci Maha Pendengar dan Maha Pemurah. I still remember that day i studied briefly which was only the first 3 chapters, little did I know I was gonna be tested about everything! And the best part? I finish it in 30mins and soon after was at the movie theatre watching Monsters Vs Aliens *LOL*

But hey, it paid off - i PASSED :)

That's all that matters. The thing to settle is the retest fees, $150.

I still have 2 more sup paper to take. Yes, that's how badly I'm doing currently. Business Law was like Social Studies and 2x HARDER. *sigh* And I really thought i passed my F&B. I studied very hard for that, but the thing that bring down the marks was my badly done assignment. Well not entirely, just my Recipe Page. I scored a pathetic 1 out of 25 marks. *sigh*

I already was gonna give up BIG TIME. I told my mum and Shahid about it, but they said never give up. Shahid gave me a pep talk in msn but the very next day, the thought of quitting still looms and I was already thinking of talking to my Programme Manager and POSB bank which I took on a study loan of 2 years. But some1 didn't give up on me! He gave me a long motivating msg which almost made me cry - IN THE TRAIN! I was soo thankful I had his words with me, i still keep that msg safely. Futhermore, I only had 2 more subjects to go and I'm done which will be in early October. Really looking forward to that special month :)

And and and....someone's birthday is coming up real soon!!

Can any1 suggest what to buy for a guy on their Bday?? Men are such lousy people to go hunting presents for! Hakz! Coz it's difficult what to buy next once you had buy everything from wallet to watch. *sigh* Another problem.

Anyway, can't wait to watch Harry Potter next week! Yipeee~! :)

Last note, tomorrow interview at Sentosa Luge and soon to come, interview at Universal Studios ;) Really wondering how to break the news to my current Manager. HAH! I dun give a F**K!

At long last...

Not much for my first entry in 2 freaking years!! *lol*

Had a multiply account with all my pictures and daily(almost!) updates. But, it's getting crowded there. I'll only use that a/c for pictures uploading, movies and whatever nots reviews and mostly for business contacts. So yah... visit http://missbehave87.multiply.com

I still keep my previous archives coz those are the moemories which I will look back and reminise once in awhile and smile, telling myself that "i had been there and done that and will miss those days" definitely.

Feel free to browse, again, my same old brand new blog =)

LoVe,
aimi